Kate and Dave are back again! The imaginary twosome have teamed up once more to deliver 25 of the very best Facebook status updates ever written by other people. This is the third in the series following the hugely popular Hubpage 50 Funny Facebook Status Ideas and its sequel 50 Funny Statuses For Facebook. Kate and Dave feel more pressure with each new compilation, they bettered the first with the second; can they better the second with the third? Why not read all of the funny Facebook status updates and let me know what you think in the comments box? Kate and Dave will stop when a Hubpage flops, so make sure that you are quick to 'like' this page if you want more!
Kate… ☆:*´¨`*twinkle twinkle little star...point me to the nearest bar ٩(-̮̮̃-̃)۶*´¨`*:.☆
Dave… Press Ctrl+W to see something amazing...
Kate… kid's dad join the facebook, kid posted on his wall : WTF! Dad asked him what is WTF? kid replied him "Welcome to Facebook..."...;)
Dave… Facebook is like Jail, you sit around and waste time, You write on walls and you get poked by people you dont know
Kate… just farted and it froze. Damn it's coooold!
Dave… is going to buy his kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, "toys not included.”
Kate… thinks this year, he is going to buy all his Christmas gifts from Nike... Made for kids by kids...
Dave… The most awkward part of meeting new people is when my kids say, “Please help us.”
Kate… He let me duct tape his mouth because I said it was my fetish; I really just wanted him to shut up.
Dave… If you have a parrot and you don’t teach it to say,”Help, they’ve turned me into a parrot”, you are wasting everybody’s time.
Kate… Dear Facebook, Stop being like my Mom and suggesting people for me to be friends with.
Dave… My day is ruined when I don't beat the "Estimated Arrival Time" my GPS gives me.
Dave… Press Ctrl+W to see something amazing...
Kate… kid's dad join the facebook, kid posted on his wall : WTF! Dad asked him what is WTF? kid replied him "Welcome to Facebook..."...;)
Dave… Facebook is like Jail, you sit around and waste time, You write on walls and you get poked by people you dont know
Kate… just farted and it froze. Damn it's coooold!
Dave… is going to buy his kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, "toys not included.”
Kate… thinks this year, he is going to buy all his Christmas gifts from Nike... Made for kids by kids...
Dave… The most awkward part of meeting new people is when my kids say, “Please help us.”
Kate… He let me duct tape his mouth because I said it was my fetish; I really just wanted him to shut up.
Dave… If you have a parrot and you don’t teach it to say,”Help, they’ve turned me into a parrot”, you are wasting everybody’s time.
Kate… Dear Facebook, Stop being like my Mom and suggesting people for me to be friends with.
Dave… My day is ruined when I don't beat the "Estimated Arrival Time" my GPS gives me.
Buy The Kindle Book!
No Amazon products foundKate… Try to say the letter 'M' without your lips touching.
Dave… Physics would have been much easier if 'Tree' instead of 'Apple' had fallen on Newton's head
Kate… If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.
Dave…. I'm not entirely sure Bob the Builder is a licensed contractor.
Kate… "9 out of 10 doctors, hate the 10th doctor"
Dave… has learned alot from his mistakes. Mainly, how the legal system works.
Kate… clicked "like" on your status just to have the satisfaction of clicking "unlike"!
Dave… ████████████████████BP™████████████████
Kate… divorced her husband over religious differences. He thought he was God and i didnt!
Dave… is worried about the Asian market: Origami Bank folded; Bonsai Bank's cutting back it's branches; Kamikaze Bank nose dived.
Kate… Today's status update is brought to you by the letter "A" and the number "1".
Dave… Everyone always talks about the early bird. How about the early worm? How'd that work out for him?
Kate… If you make a new sex position, do you get to name it? If so, I'll call it The Laptop. Internet required, partner is not.
Dave… Physics would have been much easier if 'Tree' instead of 'Apple' had fallen on Newton's head
Kate… If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.
Dave…. I'm not entirely sure Bob the Builder is a licensed contractor.
Kate… "9 out of 10 doctors, hate the 10th doctor"
Dave… has learned alot from his mistakes. Mainly, how the legal system works.
Kate… clicked "like" on your status just to have the satisfaction of clicking "unlike"!
Dave… ████████████████████BP™████████████████
Kate… divorced her husband over religious differences. He thought he was God and i didnt!
Dave… is worried about the Asian market: Origami Bank folded; Bonsai Bank's cutting back it's branches; Kamikaze Bank nose dived.
Kate… Today's status update is brought to you by the letter "A" and the number "1".
Dave… Everyone always talks about the early bird. How about the early worm? How'd that work out for him?
Kate… If you make a new sex position, do you get to name it? If so, I'll call it The Laptop. Internet required, partner is not.
No comments:
Post a Comment